...But she looked so sweet!

(image courtesy of Larry Utley)

On the topic of skills that come in handy, definitely my knowledge of wrestling and ability of moving quickly has come in super useful in the real world.

Unfortunately, many men seem to think that is okay to touch women without their consent. I am not actually talking about the more violent forms of this, but the little ways in which strangers seem to think its okay to put their hands on my waist or on the small of my back when talking to me.

For some reason, this seems to be an acceptable norm in most of this society, and it drives me nuts. I absolutely hate the way some men assume that just because they find me attractive it is oaky to interact with me in this way. Respectful conversation and flirting is one thing. Sloppy putting of hands where they shouldn't be is another.

I have had a couple of interactions with somewhat drunk men trying to hit on me, who have done this....and they did not get the usual awkward laughter and gentle moving away.

Instead they found themselves in a full or half nelson (that is the quickest and most natural hold that I find myself doing in this situation) and they were quickly pushed to their knees and humiliated. I have done this on a number of occasions.

Most random dudes are not expecting this. But I bet even in their next-day hazy memory of the night before this is one lesson they would not forget.

And I have to admit - it feels pretty awesome for me, to turn around what is annoying and disrespectful into a lesson. Its pretty empowering, and I feel pretty bad-ass for it.

Now....some of you out there probably wish you were the guy who found himself surprisingly in that full or half nelson. Well, I will like you much better if we consensually set that up as a roleplay. When I win in those pre-negotiated situations, that is when I feel most bad-ass and have the most fun.

(So if you get any bad ideas, make sure you get that hottie's consent before you act it out!)

For the Love of the Wrestling

(photo courtesy of Larry Utley)

Growing up, most of my summers were spent at the local swimming pools. When I wasn't at the pool, I was playing baseball or softball, or battling the waves at the ocean. For most of my childhood, I was on the summer swimteam, which meant daily morning swim-practices. I would often stay at the pool after practice, or I would ride my bicycle home for lunch and come back to the pool later. Both of the local pools where I spent my time were a bikable distance from where I lived.

As I began to hit puberty, the pools were great places for me to meet boys, or see the boys from school who I had crushes on...We often played games of marco polo, or swim-tag. It was during games of tag that I first began to enjoy informal wrestling, as I fought for the ladder which was base. This was especially fun if I liked the person I was fighting. Sometimes the game of tag would disintegrate into an hours-long wrestling match. Oh, how I loved this!

Wrestling was perhaps my earliest exploration of power dynmaics - a fully engaging way of establishing who was in control.
More specifically, wrestling was also one of the earliest ways in which I challenged gender norms - I was always ready to fight if someone accused me of not being able to do something because I was a girl.

As an adult this is one thing that hasn't really changed. I often playfully and informally wrestle with my friends and lovers. They often don't have quite the stamina for it is I do. This is why I especially enjoy the formal mixed wrestling matches. I love breaking out the mats, and breaking a sweat while tangling with someone who is often much bigger than me. How sweet is my victory when I have successfully forced someone twice my size into submission!

And I don't always win. But I don't give up easily. In a pins match, I try to escape as quickly as possible. In a submission match, I will squirm and maneuver until I have found a way to turn the tables. I usually only tap out if I absolutely have to.

Oh, wrestling is fun, and satisfying on a deep, sweaty level.